22. Three Weeks of Summer

When I went to pick J up from camp, one of the first things he said was, "Can you sign me up to come back next year?"  I was so happy that he had a great time.

He came back from camp ... different.  He came back happier and more talkative.  He's always been fairly talkative to me, but less so to my husband.  Of course, I am home all the time with him, and my husband works around fifty to sixty hours a week.

It's been a week since J has been back from camp and while he still has a debilitating fear of bugs, he didn't have any other tantrums.  He was a little hyperactive from time to time, but he listened and did his chores without complaining - sometimes even initiated his chores without me having to ask.

When we went to the park with his baby brother, he played with him on the playground very carefully.  He blocked any openings where he might fall, he steered him away from the slides that were hot (he even tested the slides himself first to see if they were too hot).  On the slides that were cool enough, he carefully helped him so he wouldn't fall off the bottom of the slide.

For a week, he didn't play his DS or on the PlayStation.  He didn't play with his Legos.  Instead, he spent an entire week spending time with me and his brother.  He did some arts and crafts with me while the baby slept, we watched the Lego Movie (more than once), and in general just spent time as a family.  Everything was relaxed and quiet.

When he was at camp, I know the counselors said his name and said hello every time they passed him.  I wonder how much of that came back with him.  He has certainly been much more open to saying "good morning" when he wakes up and "hello" when my husband wants in the door from work.  Whatever happened at camp that helped him to come back a happier person, I welcome it and am grateful for it.

For now, we have three weeks left of summer before school starts back.  We do get out before Memorial Day, but going back the first week of August seems really early as well.  I know I will be glad for school to commence, but part of me is really going to miss having the boys home all the time.  We will have to make the most of our three weeks and the little time we have left!

Kings of the Playground

21. Summer Camp

If there's one thing that most families with special needs kids don't have, it's an excess of money.  We're fairly lucky overall because J doesn't have any physical needs that require a lot of money, but we do pay for medications and therapies.  We buy things to help him cope better at home, and often end up spending our excess money on things to help balance the house out.  So when it comes time to look for summer camps, the ones geared towards children with autism tend to be outrageously expensive for our budget.

Then I got an email from someone in our autism group about a camp that only asks for $100 donation for a week-long sleep-away camp.  

Are they serious?!

We signed J up and he was accepted.  The activities are very stereotypical summer camp stuff: canoeing, archery, horseback riding, and they even have a rock climbing wall.  The big difference is that the counselor to camper ratio is extremely low, which will really help ensure J has a good time.  Whenever I sign him up for a neuro-typical activity, I always worry because what if the teachers/counselors/adults in charge don't know anything about autism?  What if J has one of his more violent tantrums where he screams and pounds on the floor or walls?  By going to a camp where every single adult there knows and understands autism will help not only ease my mind, but also ease J's mind.

He wants to learn archery.  That's all that he talks about, so hopefully they can help him learn.  It is something that I could see being a huge issue because if he can't hit the target then the situation has the potential for meltdown-mode.  Luckily, the camp should be completely able to handle any mishaps like that.

Our other big kid was not happy that J gets to go to camp.  He thinks it is unfair that he doesn't have autism.  But all he knows at his young age is that autism gets the ability to "cut lines" at Disney and go to fun camps.  He sees the tantrums and the hardships, but I think his young brain doesn't process it the same way we do as parents.  I can understand his frustration since he wasn't able to go to the same type of camp, but we still sent him to different camps - camps that may be harder for J to attend because of his special needs.

I feel like I need to process these thoughts regarding a child wishing they had ASD a little more in another entry.  It's rather disheartening to hear, but somewhat understandable.  It also goes back to my thoughts on making sure that your special needs child does not become the most important person in a family, and I think because J inevitably gets so much attention (albeit not always positive) because of his ASD that our other boy does not always feel as important.  From my eyes, I can sometimes see it, but other times it really frustrates me because he gets so much other focus.  On Mondays my husband takes him out to dinner, just the two of them.  He went to a camp - just him - that specifically I did not sign J up for.  We always reinforce the good things he does, and the things he is good at.

Anyway, I dropped J off at camp yesterday and he was very excited.  Which I know he was excited even though he showed no outward signs of it.  We had his bag all packed and ready, put it in the car, and drove the 50 minutes to camp.  We checked in, he got his temperature taken and answered a few regarding his medications, and then we walked to his cabin.  He picked out a bed and I helped him get his sheets on.  He brought his pillow pet, which he prefers to use as a pillow than a regular pillow, and his Star Wars sheets.  He gave me a hug and was ready for me to leave so he could have a good time and play!

I wasn't emotional dropping him off because I knew he was excited to be there.  I was very happy for him and very happy that he would get to have a normal camp experience surrounded by kids who are just like him and adults who have worked with autistic kids before.  We are very fortunate to have been given this opportunity.

Before he left, J picked out some notecards and I put addresses on them and gave him some stamps.  But if he doesn't write because he's having too much fun, I am okay with that!  I would rather him forget to write home because he's having a blast, but if I get to see a note from him then that will make me happy, too.

I still have three more full days before I go pick him up on Friday.  Here's to a great week at camp!